Rants on business, science, technology, society, politics, police, and justice, plus life hacks and tricks, since 2003. header image 2

Predictions for 2007

December 30th, 2006 · No Comments

What is everyone thinking 2007 is going to be like? 2006 was pretty lame.

My predictions for 2007:

  • End of the Iraq war, islamofascists welcome us as friends and trade partners.
  • Kim Jong Il trades a gift basket from Bath & Body works for all his nuclear weapons.
  • Indian call center industry plummets when consumers collectively rise up and demand adequate customer service. Dell, notably, ends its offshore operations.
  • Evangelical christians release their stranglehold on American politics, realizing that there is a seperation of church and state.
  • Social Security budget secured through FY 2010 thanks to a single, one-time donation of ExxonMobil quarterly profit earmarked for return to the American public.
  • Discover card is hot in 2007 because of its cashback offer; Visa, MasterCard stagnate; American Express goes out of business when people realize they don’t have to pay $75 a year for a credit card.
  • America Online resumes disk-mailing strategy, except this time, distribute HD-DVD and Bluray copies of AOL software.
  • Internet gambling continues despite federal legislation prohibiting it as people realize the feds are wholly incapable of patrolling the tubes.
  • Milton Friedman continues spinning in his grave as the Drug War continues; voters interested in repealing drug laws forget both the address of their legislators and the date on which voting takes place.
  • Looming, crocheting, pocket calculators: still immensely unpopular

What do you think?

Tags: Government & Politics · My Thoughts

0 responses so far ↓

  • There are no comments yet...Kick things off by filling out the form below.

Leave a Comment